Life doesn’t differentiate happy people or sad people. Luck might be something that comes and goes. But being happy or sad is a choice we make. That’s the beauty of our species. What makes me write this is my future book to be on “GET READY TO BE HAPPY” , also in the “wanted list” by my few readers group.
I sit alone every night in my jula ( swing) also thinking of how the day went. Introspection is an intense word but this reflection of the day, is just a habit. It all started when I taught my son his prayer before bed time and when he was scared of bad dreams, I would ask him to think of 5 good things that happened to him in the day so he has good thoughts. ” But amma, I did not finish the homework today, I got hurt while playing today – how do you want me to say thanks for the good day?” He asked in a weeping tone. “Kanna., Everyday we get mixed fruit salad with good and bad things, what we focus, attracts us. Did you drink chocolate milk today ? You met Shrujan after many months right ? You learnt a lesson not to miss homework. Mom is here with you putting you to sleep not on office call. And you are a day older my little man”, I giggle him explaining him how it is about the perception of taking positive things and choosing happiness over the hassles. Same applies to all our lives ” To chase bad dream or fear away, we have to reflect more (thereby attract more) of ‘good things’ that happened in the day.
Offlate there are many articles on it is okay to be not okay. And yes, I agree to ‘certain times in life’ where it is okay to be not okay. But in general, are you taking the efforts to wear the smile on your face & heart !? “Narmadha, looking at your posts , your status messages , how don’t you have any problems ya”, asked a friend straight to me. I sprinkle that active smile and change the topic while my heart will think “ You need 2 days to hear out if you want to hear issues and cribbing that I “also” have like any other. But I am determined not to give that, rather does my post put a smile or give hope to you ? That matters and reflects back to my happiness “. So here are 4 important things to make happiness as an attitude (tried & tested before I blog)
- Never explain yourself : I personally feel, being happy needs more strength. I know a leader in my company who is so famous for his smile and positive words. But, behind the scenes, he is handling one of the largest function and faced problems day in and out. Considering scars as tattoos is definitely a strength. Now, there will be a lot of pokers, who seek their fake pleasure in just asking you how’s and why’s. Usually, “look at the life you have, so lucky”, “hmm, you must be rich”, “wah, you have all freedom from your family” – and these are judgemental kicks. The moment you try to explain and answer, you allow yourself to crack. So, let their assumptions be in their heads and not yours.
- Be Silly & Carefree : What do we gain by controlling from jumping into the rain or doing the dink-chink step while out favorite music is playing. Maybe not in work meetings or with serious crowd, but in general, if you like it, don’t hold yourself. “Let it go” – as Elsa says. And daily, have your little silly moments which will make you laugh at them later too 🙂
- Surround yourself : with things and people that make you happy. The little balcony garden, the colorful paintings, the soothing pooja room, my own mandala art zone, indoor plants – your house interior plays a very important role in shifting your mood (messy house can annoy and vibrant ones will refresh). The same applies to the kind of people you surround yourself with.
- Find your purpose, have goals : Give anyone a lazy couch and no work to do, no scope to think – there is no happiness found in the person. Happiness needs hard work, sweat and results. But, success and happiness are two different things. While success also brings happiness, pursuing the confidence and resilience of learning from failures is certainly the attitude required. You are happy because you learnt something inspite of failing.
So, chin up, eyes straight, heart light – Go for things that make you feel power-packed. And don’t miss the dink-chink move everyday. Make happiness a part of your auto-biography.