The superpower of Observing without Judging

She speaks a lot, she loves to share stories from her life – Observation

She is just a talkative piece of annoying crap , who is “useless” and doesnt make sense with her stories – Judgement

She modulates well and is also keen in bringing up information about places and people in her stories. Her talks are always about success. She can try to become a story teller , a TedX speaker and much more – Analysis.

To become a story teller,you can take up a lot of courses and there are certified programs that train you to be a professional story teller. To become a TedX speaker, enroll in their website, keep in touch with your regional TedX members and be participative to begin with. – Guide

He is not interested in studies. He usually paints or sketches in his rough notebook during the class. – Observation

He is not going to make it to the final exam if he skips being attentive in the class and this rough note scribbling is going to scrap his life – Judgement

He has a great creativity in art of drawing. He experiments different strokes in shading and sketching. He should become an artist or graphic designer – Analysis.

Use your listening skills to understand the subjects to get a decent basic score in examination. Enroll into Visual communications for bachelors degree or arts and science can also be a choice of education. You can parallely set up your social media page and keep sharing your work to hear feedback and also participate in contests and campaigns to upskill your art. – Guide

While the above is a self-explanatory human traits and how we either observe / judge / analyze / judge other humans, the most important part to ask yourself is, did you feel “guidance” is the most effective ? Or maybe analyze? Oh wait! don’t feel glad on that. The point is, does the recipient seek your analysis / guidance ? Are we attacking them with free advice package with useful information, wasting our efforts and their time ? Oops., I have done a lot of that in my past and as I gain more experience in life and interact with people across all ages and generations including the latest gen who are just filled with amazing talents (oh latest upgraded versions of human species).

Also when I look back, who are the people that impress me, who are the ones I look up to and who would I reach when I have to seek guidance? Not the ones who judge me, not the ones who analyse my behavior, not the ones who guide me and load me with directions – but the ones who observe me without any labels. It gives a kind of “they know me well”, “they accept me as I am”, “they are the wise ones who would invest their efforts if I seek for guidance”.

Do you agree with me? Observing without judgement is an art and 1. who are your favorite people you look upto on this ? 2. time to introspect our own pattern- are you an observer or a guide or an analyst or jumps into judgement !

When I did the #1 exercise, a huge bucket of “unwanted guides and analysts were thrown to ‘dont reach them, they are waiting to show the expertise’ category”. The judgemental ones got the “stay away from them” label. And I am so thankful to have a big bunch of observers, who are my well-wishers, across ages and I feel safe to seek them for suggestions.

I loved the introspection exercise #2, where sometimes knowingly, sometimes unknowingly, we get carried away and later realize that we also fall into such buckets as we step across other’s lines. The beauty is once you realize, you learn to be cautious, to be caring and most importantly , you learn to value yourself more because you are just an observer, plain simple observer. It tunes your senses more inward than towards others. Try to learn this art for a lot of personal and professional rays of sunshine! “Live and Let Live”

Photo credits : VimalChandran, artist : Founder and director of unpostedletters !